My newly minted 3-year-old is in this funny stage where he loves Mommy so much, he occasionally wants to squeeze me to death. I equate it to that thing with babies, where they somehow seem so adorable and impossibly sweet that you just want to (delicately, gently) bite them. I’m not completely nuts—there’s even […]
Me and Lego: Everything Is NOT Awesome
I can’t believe that I’m going to admit this in a public forum, but here goes: I am apparently not as smart as a fifth grader—or a preschooler. I was the valedictorian of my high school class. I took courses like Calculus and Advanced Placement Biology. I finished college a year early, with honors. […]
11 Ways to Annoy Your Toddler for the Holidays
Before I had a kid, I thought that holiday gatherings were all about Santa-shaped cookies and eggnog. About decking the halls, stealing kisses under the mistletoe and feeling all of those warm and fuzzy feelings. And about cocktails—lots of cocktails. Silly me. Now that I have a kid, I know the true purpose of […]
The Holidays: Then and Now
If there’s one indisputable fact about motherhood, it’s that kids change everything. The holidays are no exception. When you have kids, you can practically hear the pitter-patter of reindeer feet on your roof. Santa is alive, well and magical. There are tons of cookies, impossibly cute baby outfits and handmade toddler ornaments for the […]
Help! The Holidays Are Coming!
Pumpkin pie. Special time with your loved ones. Insanely cute turkey-themed onesies. Seeing the holidays through the wide, amazed eyes of your baby. Your baby’s picture-perfect outfit—and the nearby wall—covered in pumpkin pie. Family members questioning your choice to give pumpkin pie to your baby. Your baby’s refusal to eat anything other than pie now […]
5 Reasons I’m in Big Trouble As a Mom
Most of the time, I look at my toddler and see a baby. A perfect, sweet, smiley, dimpled, slightly crazy baby. And sometimes I look at him and see him as a grown man. Or at least a teenager who’s going to give me a heart attack someday. Because I’ve realized that there are […]
Dear Toddler: Ketchup Isn't a Food Group
Keep your fancy sandwiches with your un-American cheese. Keep your charbroiled-to-perfection burgers. Keep your panko-and-parmesan-crusted chicken that had the audacity not to come out of a freezer box. Keep your great-grandmother’s four-generations-tested lasagna and those weird noodles. And certainly keep your vegetables unless…unless…never mind. Keep your vegetables. No, my toddler […]
9 Ways Life with Kids Is Like a Circus
You know how everyone always jokes that once you have kids, your life becomes a total circus? Here’s a little harsh reality for you: It’s not a joke. Your life is a circus. And you are the hapless ringmaster. There’s no use trying to fight it. So put on your sparkliest cape (from […]
Warning: Bossy Toddler on the Loose!
I feel like I’m living in Footloose. And not in the good “Kevin Bacon is awesome” way. In the “I’ve got a little dictator telling me what to do” way. “No dancing!!!” Such has been the decree of my 2-and-a-half-year-old lately, and it alternates with: “No singing!!!” Not all the time, but sporadically, […]
Things My Kid Says That Make Me Smile
All kids are cute. Then they start talking, and they get even cuter. When they’re not saying—er, screaming—“NOOOOOOOO!!!” that is. Case in point: The other day, my 2-and-a-half-year-old requested that I read his Star Wars: Colors book to him. Now, I’m a huge Star Wars nerd and have been since I was 2, so […]
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